Silence, ye of pesky little faith who were too busy whining about Dante’s new haircut to try this game for yourself. You go away. The rest of you please, come hither, grab a comfortable chair and let me tell you the story of when a Western Developer kicked Japan’s arse.

It all started back in 2001, when Capcom wanted to make the next instalment of their famed Resident Evil series. But what actually emerged was Devil May Cry, an entirely new franchise with an all-new American hero, half man, half demon, who spent his waking hours decimating monsters to metal music with his big sword. Fans sucked it up through their straws and burped with satisfaction, crying ‘More, please!’

But over ten years later, our leading man Dante is getting on in years and the cutesy Japanese edge he was born with is blunt from over-use. Capcom were smart enough to recognise this, so they put him up for adoption and Cambridge based developer Ninja Theory were the new proud parents.

That was the best decision in recent gaming history; DmC: Devil May Cry is fresh, it’s brand spanking new, it’s got it’s attitude back and even slaps you on the back of the head when you’re not looking. I blasted through every minute and though the fling only lasted ten hours, I wanted to give it my phone number and wait desperately for it to call me back.

Ninja Theory started from the ground up. You play a grass-roots Dante who has no idea about his past or family and doesn’t think an inch above his crotch. His world is your world, a city alive at night with subways, nightclubs and bad habits for a lad in his twenties. You instantly relate to him, which is all a gamer needs to get behind their hero. The dialogue is a vast improvement on the kitsch, pun-tastic history of this series too and the emotions and motives of the characters feel much more tangible. Though I’ll be damned if every other fucking word is the same fucking curse word trying too fucking hard to be cool. For fuck sake.

But the big fat question of course is combat. It is after all the lifeblood of Devil May Cry and it flows freely through the hyperventilated veins of the new DmC. You wield multiple weapons in this modern title, with devil arms, guns and a meaty array of combos to cleave, shoot and whip through. Stacking these combos is such a personal endeavour that you can customise it to your chosen fetish; spin a scythe through demon bellies, shoot mines into robotic cherubs and watch them explode or just jump up and punch a witch into the floor to shatter her into blood red orbs. Yummy yum yum.

To lambast the combat system would be juvenile, it just works beautifully. Not only does it honour the almost faultless fluidity of its predecessors, it upgrades it with an extra pinch of Ninja Theory salt. Somehow they managed that impossible task of staying true to the old framework whilst adding a creative edge that makes this game truly their own. My personal favourite are the devil arms. No longer are they manually selected, you simply crack a trigger and a devil arm appears until you let go and morph back into Rebellion. Each new addition to your arsenal is carefully woven into the narrative to allow you to master each flavour gradually and the environment morphs into the perfect training ground without even exerting itself. You’re a master demon slayer without having to master anything, it all feeds into you naturally and never takes you away from gameplay.

Another medal of honour for this game is the level design. It is a masterstroke of gorgeous graphics and incredible art design that lifts the overall experience above what most of us were expecting. From carnival piers and city back-alleys to the bowels of corporations and demonic nightclubs, you travel through a modern utopia that forgoes the obvious gothic playground you would envision.

Breaking through the fourth wall into a live news transmission was a satisfying twist on this norm. And then there is the parallel dimension of Limbo, a demonic perversion of the real world where Dante is met with inimical hostility from the walls themselves, stark white words scrawled onto the landscape to threaten and follow him, a notable and effective embodiment of the uncanny.

Replayability almost goes without saying. Each mission has its own set of doors, keys and collectibles that will always warrant another go and the levels are so gosh darn pretty. But for bigger appetites, the Vergil’s Downfall expansion pack is available March 6th, and right now you can download the free Bloody Palace upgrade, which is another sweet signature of the series with revamped generosity from the series’ new handlers.

So did Ninja Theory do a good job? Well, in answer to all the nervous twitches of snivelling fanboys, they stuck up a big one-two and patched a Union Jack on precious Dante’s sleeve. They aren’t just self aware, they’re rebels with pride in their own creation and that is exactly how handlers of Dante should act in my opinion – like the cocksure hero himself. So ignore the tripe and add this game to your collection. It will feel like a rebellion of its own and you’ll be glad you did it.

But if you do forgo this venture purely out of your own stubbornness? Well, I’ll let Dante answer that one…

Rating: 9 out of 10 stars

As Dead Space 3 has just been released (8th Feb, 2113), I thought I’d start at the beginning.

In Dead Space, you star as Isaac Clark… an engineer on a mission to go and fix the communications problems on the planet buster (a deep space mining ship) ‘USG Ishimura’. The Ishimura went quiet a while back, and someone far more important than you sent off a small ship of hapless victi… um, crew to find out what the problem is and to fix it. You signed up for it because your girlfriend is on the Ishimura. Not your best decision ever.

The game begins as you find and approach the setting of the bundle of joy, panic, fear and splatter that is Dead Space. From this point onwards, if it’s not gone wrong already, it soon will.

While I can’t say more about the storyline without getting all spoilery, I can say that the storyline is the weakest part of the game. But it is sufficient to carry the game forward. There is more going on than at first appears, but you don’t really care (other than ‘Oh, right. That’s why’). Finding out the titbits of information is nice, but it is the atmosphere and game play that make this game.

Unless you play it on easy (don’t) it is a real survival horror game. Not only do you have to deal with the rampaging nasties, known as Necromorphs, but you also have to worry about finding ammo, health packs and power modules (used to upgrade your gear and open the odd, useful but unessential, door). So do you stand your ground and slug it out with the sickle armed monstrosity charging towards you hoping that you can take it down before it rips your face off, and then drops that health pack you really need… Or run screaming for the nearest door. Either way, if he’s brought his mates it’s gonna get messy.

The Necromorphs are very nicely done. They come in a large variety of shapes and sizes. From the teeny ones that flop along the floor (generally in sizable packs) to the armour plated behemoths that caused me much pain and many deaths, there is not one that you are relieved to see. And the game mechanics are a very refreshing change from ‘shoot em in tha face!!!’

Quite a lot of thought has obviously been put into making the shooty elements of this game a bit different. Each of the different types of Necromorph should be handled slightly differently. You can just pump rounds into (most of) them until they fall over. But you will soon run out of ammunition. Oh, and their mates will probably be chewing on your back while you do it. The weak points on many of them are their limbs. It is a subtle difference from most shooters, but it really works. And it makes for many more satisfying, and spectacular, takedowns than simply watching a head explode through a sniper scope. If only the buggers would stop waving their arms around so much!

Unlike so many shooters, you only get 7 weapons to play with. But this is enough. Each weapon is significantly different to the others, and has its own advantages in various situations. The trouble is you can only carry 4 at a time. And you never know which you are going to need next. Oh, and there is no way you can upgrade them all on a single play through. Also, you generally find ammo for one of the guns you are carrying… And you have very limited space in your backpack. The number of times I had run out of the munitions for the gun I needed against a particular type of ‘morph cos my bag was too full of ammo for the gun that just tickled them!!!!

All of that said, Dead Space is not really a shooter. Well, it is. But it isn’t either the design or the highpoint of the game. For me, the star was the atmosphere. The creeping down derelict corridors, jumping at every clang, thump and howl… Knowing that at some point, something is going to jump out and be really mean to you. The flickers of the shadow of something moving around the corner. The glimpse of something darting past a window. And what exactly knocked over that cylinder that is rolling down the corridor towards you?!!!

The lighting and sound really add to the tension. The extended periods of heart pumpingly tense quiet really do heighten the panic of when a selection of the denizens of the Ishimura do jump out at you.

There are also some small touches (such as the inspired holographic display) that really floated my boat. But you can find them for yourselves.

Suffice it to say, I really enjoyed this game. Enough to forgive the small annoyances I had with the plot.

As with all tension based games, I recommend that you don’t over play it. It’s easy to burn out and not notice the atmosphere anymore. And you don’t want to waste atmosphere this good.

Rating: 8 out of 10 stars

After the franchise buffet of 2012, I thought it would be nice to kick off the New Year with a wee indie game review for a change. So let’s take a look at one that got everybody talking: Slender: The Eight Pages.

Press Play and this game has one simple introduction: “Collect 8 pages”. No preamble, no storyline, just words on a screen before you’re left alone in a deserted forest with a flashlight and a purpose. Right, off you go then.

As you take your first-person steps it becomes apparent that this forest is quietly malevolent. The darkness is intrusive against your weak beam of light and all you can make out for a long time are hundreds of trees and the sound of your own feet. You walk without a plan or a map, trying to fathom where the path lies until you stumble haphazardly onto your first page of white paper, mostly out of dumb luck. You even think this might be easy, you only need seven more of them, right?

But there is absolutely no clue as to where the rest of the pages lie. The wilderness is pitch dark and full of trees and you can barely make out a footpath to follow. Then there comes that inevitable sinister turn where you realise why this is a psychological horror…

There is a man in the woods. The Slender Man. You know from the second you first spot him lurking in the dark that he is following you everywhere around the map, and simply appears anytime he wants. A crackle of static corrupting your screen acts as your only detector to his presence, and the stark contrast of this sudden noise scares you into action. And for good reason, for should you find yourself in front of the silent Slender Man for more than a few seconds, you’re dead and start all over again. Simple and brutal, so get a move on.

I have to confess that I had an absolute ball ducking and diving to avoid this nasty. With the lights off and the sound up, I was eating my heartbeat every few minutes and urged to carry on playing with masochistic fascination. There’s no fluff to drag out the experience, it just stalks you and maims you for the entire time the clock is running and its marvellous.

As far as aesthetics go, do not be fooled by the archaic simplicity of the graphics, either. Remember the early days of Silent Hill? When limitations in design forced creators to be clever with atmospheric fog because they didn’t have the capacity to load expansive game environments? The genius of overcoming imposed limitations like this shall forever be extoled in my eyes as one of the greatest superiorities of early horror games. It’s a humble practice, admitting your boundaries and embracing them, but one that the likes of Slender: The Eight Pages utilises like a boss.

Pausing for a moment, let me just say that the locations of the eight pages would be my grievance with this indie title. Your blind search around the unmarked map can become tedious and with mister mental growing more relentless with every page you pick up, it’s only a matter of time before you meet a sticky end. But after all that is what makes the game notorious, turning its completion into a badge of honour that communities all over the Internet have been falling over themselves to achieve (with some amusing video diary results).

Slender: The Eight Pages is a challenge. For anyone who has a spare ten minutes and wants a bite-sized thrill ride, then go get this game. The bonus is that this title is also completely FREE, thanks to selfless creator Mark Hadley. So I challenge you to attempt all eight pages and let us know about it. Download directly from the Parsec Productions website and check out the upcoming sequel on their homepage while you’re at it.

It’s bloody hard, and not good for nerves. So best of luck n’ that.

Rating: 8 out of 10 stars

Following the release of an absolutely stunning debut trailer in April of last year, I’d had my eye on Arkane Studio’s Dishonored for quite some time; so when Christmas of 2012 rolled around and I found myself with a copy of it clutched in my turkey grease-smeared fingers, I was understandably eager to play it.

(Not pictured: turkey grease)

The game opens as skull-masked Corvo Attano, the Lord Protector of Empress Jessamine Kaldwin, returns to the city of Dunwall; however, soon after, mysterious figures appear out of nowhere, killing the empress before vanishing into thin air.

One job, Corvo. You had one job.

Anyway, moments later the Lord Regent arrives, charging Corvo with the murder of the empress and locking him away in prison to await execution, before proclaiming himself as ruler of the nation. During his incarceration, Corvo learns of a plot by a group of loyalists to break him out in order to clear his name and overthrow the Lord Regent in place of Emily Kaldwin, the rightful heir to the throne. As Corvo, it’s then up to you to escape the prison, and join the loyalists in their attempts to restore some sort of semblance of balance to Dunwall.

One of the wonderful things about Dishonored is that despite being Supernatural Assassin Extraordinaire, you can choose to play through the entire game without killing a single person. To the lowly guards and such, this may be a simple case of sneaking up behind them and rendering them unconscious, but when it comes to the main assassination targets, each has their own individual non-lethal method of pacification. Some of these methods may seem a little needlessly convoluted, but this is one of the ways in which Dishonored stands apart: the solution to each method is there within the level, if you look hard enough. In this sense, it harks very much back to the point-and-click games of the early ‘90s; which is rather uplifting in this era of video games in which everything seems to be spoon-fed to the player. It gives a chance for the player to work things out for themselves, which in turn makes the game a lot more engaging (and consequently a lot more rewarding).

Scattered through each level are ancient runes that you can use as currency to imbue Corvo with a number of different supernatural powers, each tailored to allow the player to approach the game in a number of ways. You can choose to try and remain as stealthy as possible, opting to upgrade Blink (your short-range teleport spell), and Dark Vision (an ability that allows you to see enemies through walls), for example; or you can choose to go into all-out berserker mode by upgrading Blood Thirsty (increasing your melee skill) and Vitality (increasing your health), amongst others. I opted for the former during my playthrough, trying to attract as little attention as possible throughout the game. Interestingly enough, both approaches are likely to unlock different endings: the world of Dishonored operates via a Chaos system that affects the outcome of the game. The less attention you attract, the lower your Chaos level; the lower your chaos level, the smaller an impact you will have upon the game-world. If you choose to leave a trail of death and destruction wherever you go, it manifests through a number of different ways (not least via more guards being present towards the latter part of the game). This certainly increases the replayability of Dishonored: it’ll be fascinating to explore Dunwall with a high chaos level to see how much changes.

Part of the pure fun of Dishonored comes from simply exploring; working out which buildings are scaleable, eavesdropping on conversations, trying to find the best way to approach a room. In fact, if you’re anything like me, you’ll often find yourself loading and reloading a particular moment just to enable you to get from one door to the next without being spotted. There’s an odd sort of choreography that arises from moments like this, as you work out the movements of the guards on their patrols.

Arkane have crafted an astounding landscape in Dunwall that just begs to be parkoured around. Part plague-ridden slums, part soaring opulence, its oil-fuelled, electro-steampunk aesthetic manages to check a number of familiar tropes without ever seeming to replicate one particular style. Augmenting the reality of Dishonored’s world are a myriad of books, notes, ledgers and tomes; each containing diegetic fiction and non-fiction alike. The histories of Dunwall, Gristol and Pandyssia are fascinating, and it’s only through a number of playthroughs and a number of approaches that the player will get a full idea of the extent of its lore. Clearly inspired by Industrial Revolution London, the appearance of folk songs such as The Drunken Sailor help ground Dunwall in some sort of reality.

The large majority of the voice talent is incredible, with the likes of film veterans Susan Sarandon and Carrie Fisher helping to bring each character to life; however, the dialogue of the ambient characters has a tendency to suffer from the Grand Theft Auto III effect, seeming both repetitive and disjointed throughout. (I think ‘Shall we gather for cigars and whiskey tonight?’ is going to be the new ‘We’re going to Aruba!’)

Of course, it’s not all perfection. Playing through on Normal difficulty, I felt almost too overpowered for the game; upgrading the Dark Vision ability enough grants Corvo the ability to see key objects with a blue overlay – they may as well be captioned ‘Use This to Win’ in bright neon letters. The AI have a tendency to be a little stupid too: it’s almost as though they suffer from a form of short-term amnesia that prevents them from fully remembering suspicious activity. I’d be interested in seeing how that changes on tougher difficulties though.

All in all, however, Dishonored is a fantastic game that I thoroughly recommend picking up.

Rating: 8.5 out of 10 stars

A bunch of very naughty people performed a ritual. Six years and (approximately) nine months later, it turns out that the son of a senator is actually the son of the devil. Hmmm… This may be a good idea for a film.

So in the game, you play the role of the six year old Dami… um… Lucius. You get to walk him through his formative years as he discovers his developing Hell spawned powers and arranges a series of unfortunate accidents for the people that have bugged him.

Yes, this is the game version of Omen. With names, locations and plot sufficiently changed to avoid those pesky copyright issues. And it does a pretty good job of it.

As you awaken into the young lads rather twisted psyche, you witness your mum telling one of the servants what time you should be in bed by. Oh yes, she will be first! No, not yer mum… The innocent maid who is simply following instructions. Come on. You are new to this evil stuff. You gotta start small.

Once you have offed this poor lass, your real dad pops up to show his appreciation and to encourage you to more socially unacceptable behaviour. And so begins your career of engineering more and more elaborate and messy ends to the various members of the household. And if you keep daddy happy, he bestows upon you more hellish powers.

The game takes place in your family home. And by home, I mean mansion. Getting lost in your own house will soon cease to be an irritation and become the norm. Especially as there are other irritations that will soon surmount this. You are not told who is next in line for an unfortunate accident. You have to find them yourself. This can involve quite a lot of running about talking to people at random. And once you have identified your next mark, you have to work out how the hell (no pun intended) you are going to finish them.

My first thoughts were ‘Ooh. A scary Hitman’. And that comparison holds water. The big difference is that in Hitman, as long as the target stops breathing, you have succeeded. But it’s up to you to choose the method. In Lucius, you have to find the right things to do in (pretty much) the right order to achieve the result that they (the developers) have imagined. But this is where my niggles end.

The game is really fun. A bit slow (again I refer you to Hitman), but really quite nice. Admittedly, the controls are a bit clunky. But this is something we have come across before, and chosen to not let it spoil the game. And all things considered… You get to play as Damie… um… Lucius !

While it may sound a bit hit and miss finding the next target or next step on the path to their doom, you are not on your own. And this is not all you get to do. And one thing leads to another. Seeing as people are dying, you need to maintain the illusion that you are an innocent six year old. So you need to do your chores, like cleaning your teeth and tidying your room. Talking to people around the house will unlock various chores. And doing them paints you as a very good boy. And good boys get presents. Fortunately, these presents help you in your real goal. For example, the Ouija board gives you a cryptic clue as how to ruin your next victim’s day, the music box can help you to find items you need and the tricycle helps you get around faster.
(Hint: Everyone keeps the bin in the cupboard under the kitchen sink, right?)

Lucius is a low budget title. It does not have the huge industry funding that most releases have. So it is not as slick as it could be. But it does not suffer unduly as a result. I would have preferred it if it wasn’t quite so ‘on rails’. But I still had much fun finding where the rails were and thoroughly enjoyed the results.

I like supporting the independents in the various communities in which I choose to spend my life. I like to think is helps keep the big companies on their toes, amongst other things. And rarely have I appreciated an independent work as much as this one. It is well worth a look.

Rating: 7 out of 10 stars

A nameless boy, merely a silhouette against a ghostly background, awakens, eyes aglow, in a nightmarish, hostile world, unarmed and helpless; and you are equipped with nothing but the knowledge that the boy is courageously trying to find and save his sister.

Thus opens Limbo.

Limbo (or Minimalism: the Game, as I like to call it) is a two-dimensional platforming side-scroller; the debut title of Danish games studio Playdead. Aesthetically, it is as far removed from the traditional side-scroller as possible; eschewing the bright garish colours of traditional games such as Mario and Sonic for a high-contrast, chiaroscuro style. Masked by the flicker of old film grain, the stark, monochromatic aesthetics bring an odd beauty to the game; morbid though it may be.

In a world where everything from graphics to sound to gameplay are getting more and more envelope-pushing; more and more complex and intricate; it’s refreshing to see a game vanguarding simplicity. And (aesthetically, at least) Limbo does this wonderfully.

You will often find yourself going through large portions of the game hearing nothing but the rustle of your own footsteps, along with a low-level ambience and the occasional cry of an unknown creature. Sound is used expertly in Limbo, setting the tone of the game right from the get-go. And yet, despite its minimalism, many of the game’s puzzles hinge on little sound cues notifying you that progression has been made. During my first playthrough I spent what must have been quarter of an hour on a simple puzzle, getting more and more frustrated, just because I had assumed that a certain metallic clang was part of the general ambience and had just ignored it. I’m sure anyone who has played the game even a little will know which puzzle I’m talking about.

If I had to sum up the atmosphere of Limbo in a single word, it would be ‘lonely’. You’ll occasionally encounter enemies – mostly in the form of similarly silhouetted humans, sometimes in the form of, yes, GIANT SPIDERS – but they are few and far between. More often than not, it’s just you in a big landscape o’ nothingness; the massive indistinct forms looming out of the mists behind doing nothing to assuage the sense of sheer insignificance. And yet, despite the distinct absence of anything actively dangerous, there is a continuous underlying feeling of threat that pervades the game; which says a lot about the effectiveness of the atmosphere the developers have crafted.

Speaking of threat, I’m just gonna say this now: if you’re planning on picking up this game, be prepared to die. A lot. Fortunately, brutal as the game may be (and believe me, despite the rather cartoonish appearance of its hero, it is definitely brutal), it’s actually – fortunately – rather forgiving. Regardless of where you happen to die, you’ll respawn only a few feet beforehand, punishment-free, ready to reattempt the puzzle again. Just accept it and move on.

Unfortunately for me as a reviewer, being such a minimalistic game there’s very little to address. The pacing feels a little weird at times, and it perhaps ends a little too abruptly for my liking, but otherwise Limbo is a phenomenal game. Clocking in at around the four-hour mark (shorter if you’re familiar with the puzzles), it isn’t the world’s longest game; but fortunately every minute is used to its full effect. And even once the game reaches its climax and you quit the game, you’ll find yourself thinking about it soon enough, trying to work what the hell the last four hours were all about.

I certainly did, anyway.

Rating: 9 out of 10 stars

If you don’t know about the Resident Evil franchise, shame on you. SHAME! There have been a gazillion games (oh, only 5… Really? Feels like more), a bunch of films (a couple of which are worth watching), a load of novels and some comics. So to have failed to come across it before must have taken no small amount of effort on your part. Don’t think of this as a criticism. It’s just an explanation of why I’m going to gloss over any introduction or preamble and dive straight in.

It’s more of the same. Umbrella kinda broke Raccoon City, so they have moved on to pastures new (kinda. Not the same mob, but they fall under the same… er… y’know). But we still have loads of zombies, the world going to hell in a hand basket and faffing about with green and red herbs. Oh, and gun wielding heroes (and heroines, in supporting roles I know! It is 2012!).

I must confess… I’m not a big RE fan. Oh, I love the premise. And I enjoyed most of nearly all of the movies. But the games… not so much. And this was almost entirely down to the controls, the camera and the endless running along walls, hitting a button in an attempt to find stuff (mainly to stop yourself dying). But I played the demo of 6 and thought it may have promise. So I bought it.

Now, I should point out that I have played worse games. And Capcom have made vast improvements on the RE games I have really put much time into (1, 2 and a bit of 4 at my bro’s). But they have still missed the mark. Not by a great deal, but by three feet or three miles… It’s still a miss.

But before I sound like I’m slating it too badly, let’s start with…

The Good

It is, at times, reasonably fast paced. It seems to have borrowed quite heavily from the hugely successful Left 4 Dead games. The appeal of the frantic panic of those games, seems to have affected this release. But thankfully, Capcom haven’t created an L4D clone. They have simply boosted the adrenaline of their own machine. A bit. You still have the tense creeping through darkened hallways, with only a gnats whisker of health left. You still have the prostrate corpses littering your path, and you KNOW some of them will start chewing at your ankles as you tiptoe past. But some of the action scenes are ramped up way beyond my previous RE experiences. The zed movements are pretty damn sexy at times. Shoot the one at the front of a horde in the leg, and not laugh yer arse off when all his mates fall over him. I dare you. Oh yes… the shot impact effects, and resultant physics, are gorgeous.

Another nice touch is that there are three campaigns, featuring a couple of RE perennials. All of which run along (pretty much) the same timeline, and interweave with each other. In the campaigns you can play as Leon, Chris (you know them, right?) or Jake. They are partnered up with Helena, Piers and Sherry respectively. (Or you can play the partners if you prefer. Loadout is pretty much the only difference).

This is another plus point for RE6. The co-op play. You and a friend can face the zombie horde together. But if you don’t have a friend (available, I meant available), your partner will be AI controlled. Or just leap online and dive into someone else’s game, or wait til they jump into yours. You can even give an indication of your play style in the setup. Nice touch.

And the storylines (whilst a bit naive and contrived at times) stitch the gameplay together quite nicely. I’m actually looking forward to finding out what happens further down the line.

Finally, with the introduction of skill sets (ability boosts that you unlock by earning skill points during play) and a bunch of medals and achievements, some thought has been put into replayability. That said, each campaign has five chapters. And the chapters aren’t short. I’m not sure anyone other than die hard fans will want to go back and do it again.

The Bad

It’s a Third Person Shooter. I actually like TPS games. But when the character gets in the way of seeing the lurching minions of doom as they emerge from the shadows to eat your face, it gets a bit irritating. The camera is not far enough back to see what is going on around you, and not positioned high enough to see what is going on in front of you. You constantly have to work the right stick to stay alive. Not conducive to appreciate the pretty of the world, which is pretty. Dark, but pretty.

The tutorial is quite possibly the worst I have ever played and does not give you any real indication of what to expect. It is almost entirely reaction based interaction within an extended cut scene. You just have to hit the right button or waggle the stick at the right moment. Not good. Not good at all.

The storyline is, at times, almost childlike in its naivety. Hell, right at the start of the first campaign, Leon (a veteran of Racoon City) tries to talk down a zombified world leader that is about to chow down on his partner. Yeah, cos that has worked so well in the past. And this is but one, none spoilerific (it’s in the opening cutscene), example of Capcom forgetting that this is an 18 release. They really shouldn’t treat us like kids.

The Ugly

It’s a Resident Evil game. So it’s going to be the same as all the others… The camera, the controls and the ‘fannying’ around trying to find useful stuff. In their defence, all of these are a vast improvement on its forbears. But after umpteen years and several previous attempts, I’d bloody hope so. However, I do find it increasingly galling that Capcom have consistently failed in at least two out of three of these areas in all of their games that I have played. Other companies nail it, and yet fail on the depth and immersiveness of their universe. Capcom have got the bit that requires imagination and talent (although, their script writers could do somewhat better). Why can’t they get right the bits that they could just copy off other games (by which I mean take inspiration from, cos no-one likes a plagiarist)?

All in all, this is almost the game it should be. But sadly, it is ‘almost’ in virtually every area. There isn’t much here that you couldn’t get from a combination of a Romero film, a couple of zombie books (World War Z and Plague of the Dead spring to mind) and Left 4 Dead (1 or 2). They would last longer, be more fun and still probably cost about the same. But if you are a die hard RE fan, this is definitely the best so far.

Rating: 5.5 out of 10 stars

“Are you STUPID??!! Don’t go down there! It’s dark!!!!”

Yeah, I’ve screamed that at the screen many times. But in Blindside, you don’t really have a choice.

This may seem slightly out of order for a game review, but lets start with the graphics… There are none!

Ok, this is a little misleading. There are, but they look like this.

That is it. That’s all you get. The reason for this is that, in Blindside, you are blind. Or it’s all gone dark, or something.

In the first 2 minutes of the game you discover that the lights aren’t working. Neither is your torch, or… um… matches. Oh, they sound like they are lighting, but it didn’t stop me smacking my shins on the coffee table or head butting the TV. And shortly after that, you discover that there are some slavering beasties that don’t seem to have a problem with ripping apart your (also recently visually impaired) neighbours.

So here we have our premise. It is down to heroic you, to save your (not at all whiny) girlfriend from unknown beasties, whilst not being able to see shit. And one of the most innovative computer games I have played in a long time.

You can’t see anything, so there is nothing to see. It is all done by sound. The hiss of the static on the TV and the ticking clock are all you have to orient yourself. You stumble around your flat, bumping into furniture (as we have all done on a Friday night, with the lights on), trying to find your way to the kitchen. It’s a bit bizarre, and really not easy. But it’s different and strangely engrossing. Before long you have your first encounter with the slavering beasties. This was actually really quite scary. It was close and snacking on your unfortunate neighbour… But (of course) you can’t see it. You’ve got to sneak away. You WANT to sneak away. But which way is away??!! My heart was actually pumping away as I quietly spun on the spot to make sure I didn’t tip-toe into it’s waiting jaws, which I had no doubt were big and held many pointy teeth.

Many good horror films rely upon what you can see. Many great horror films rely upon what you can’t. In this game you can see absolutely nothing. It is more like an interactive radio play. I know! What? How?! But it (mostly) works.

This is both good and bad. I have a vivid and immersive imagination. When reading a book I can create the world I cannot see. And as such I managed to create the atmosphere that this game is aiming towards. But I can see it falling flat for many people. The controls are a complete bugger. Turning left and right are both good things. But not knowing how fast you are turning, or which way you were facing beforehand makes it pretty much guesswork. A bit like suddenly finding yourself blind, I’d guess. Try playing it without the compass… I dare you.

In many low budget, indie films you (if you are anything like me) have probably been mildly irritated by the stars and/or supporting cast. Same here. Our hero is often a little cryptic about where we should be going. His girlfriend would probably have been abandoned if I knew her in real life (I’m not a tolerant person, and she couldn’t help me look for the bloody matches??!! Ok, this may be a bit harsh. But I had bruised shins, a lump forming on my forehead and was mildly perturbed that I couldn’t see diddly. And she sat on the bed being particularly unhelpful! And before you know it, she’s all gung ho… On your behalf!).

But this, and the mildly clunky feel of the navigation, are not enough to write this game off. For its innovation alone I would give it top marks. For the atmosphere (which swings wildly between tense and confused), it also gets a high score. Where it falls down is its wide ranging appeal. It’s not a fast paced shooter or a deep and engaging strategy game. It is slow, and relies almost entirely on your patience and ability to immerse yourself in a world only hinted at. If you can do this, it is rewarding and hugely different. Hell, that is what it is aiming at. And in this respect, it pretty much hits it mark.

I have a huge amount of respect for the game. And for the developers for having the balls (and insight… although that may be the wrong word, as their aim was to create a game that the sighted and blind could enjoy equally) to come up with and release something so innovative and seriously atmospheric.

And for less than the cost of a pint? Can you really complain?

[Note: For those of you who have not come across Desura before, it's like Steam. An online refectory of games to buy, download and play. Google 'Desura' to find it.]

Rating: 6.5 out of 10 stars

We’ve all made our plans for the zombie apocalypse (if you haven’t… Why the hell not??!!). Now you get to see if it would work. Ok, maybe not your precise plan. Because you are not in your own neck of the woods. But this is the closest I have seen to a proper zombie holocaust survival game.

Day Z is a mod (an adaptation of the graphics and gameplay to change the look and feel of an existing game) for Arma II. It changes a fairly realistic combat simulator into a fairly realistic panic fest.

You are dropped off on the coast of zombie infested area of fictional Russia (or there abouts) called Chernarus. You’ve got to love the kind people that left you there, cos they provided you with a backpack containing meager medical supplies and a torch. Gee thanks!!! You then have to survive. Off you go.

Seriously, that is all you get in the way of equipment and guidance (and that guidance is courtesy of me, not the game). Not tough enough for you? Ok. You have to worry about getting eaten by zombies, which I assume you already guessed. But you also have to worry about hunger and thirst. If you don’t eat and drink at regular intervals, you will die. Oh, and hyperthermia. You may note that I didn’t mention food, drink or a nice jumper being in your backpack.

Not to worry. There are plenty of towns around, where you can find everything you need. Unfortunately, this is also where the zombies hang out. They do tend to avoid the vast areas of woodland between the areas of ex-habitation, but good luck finding what you need to survive out there! So all you have to do is sneak into an area plagued with zombies and find a weapon, ammo for that weapon, food, drink and anything else you may find useful. Like a map and compass.

Oh, did I forget to mention that? When you spawn (arrive) your location appears on the screen (in a blink and you miss it kind of way). But unless you know the map (or brought the right copy of Arma II that has a paper map with it [like me... smug grin]) you are kinda lost. Unless you find one, there is no in game map. And even then, it doesn’t show you where you are on it. I know! It’s almost like it were real life!

Assuming that you survive your foraging, and find everything you need, your problems are not over. You get through your provisions and ammo supplies at a reasonable rate. So you need to find more. Also, there are other people in the same situation as you. And not all of them are friendly. You are as likely to be shot by another survivor coveting your precious supplies as be eaten by zombies.

On my first play, the tension was palpable. Creeping around a town, skirting zombie infested areas, trying to find something to eat, drink and defend myself with. But the real cause of actual fear was when I encountered another player! The zeds are a given. They see or hear you, they are going to try and eat your face. They notice you and you’re for it, or have a fight on your hands. But other people??!! Are they hostile? Are they going to play nice and then shoot me in the back of the head? It seriously adds a new level of tension to an already tense game!!! You’ve seen The Road, right?

Day Z is an Alpha mod. This is one that is in the earliest stages of development. So don’t expect huge amounts of content. Don’t get me wrong; what has already been done is absolutely superb. But what I have mentioned is pretty much all you get. Wander around and try to stay alive. Ok, there are vehicles and a huge map to explore. But it is essentially all ‘sneak about, find stuff, hide and/or run screaming!’

This is by far the best that I have ever encountered at what it tries to do. But this is all you are going to get, for now. Bohemia Interactive (the guys that released Arma II) have spotted potential here. Maybe due to the fact that there are roughly a million people playing it worldwide at present. They are going to release the mod as part of the next official Arma II release. But I have also heard a whisper (which, as yet I haven’t been able to confirm. But it sounds legit) that it is currently being developed as a stand alone release.

The Good

It is HUGELY atmospheric. Hugely! Creeping around, hearing the moans and shuffling of the undead is really unnerving. Not having a huge supply of ammo is a refreshing pain in the arse. And it is the most convincing horror survival simulator that I have ever come across. Oh, and it’s dead pretty too.

The Bad

It’s bloody hard. The official site shows the average life expectancy. Currently (at time of typing) an hour and a half!!!! It is way easier if you get together with a bunch of buds and watch each other’s backs. Solo is a nightmare. Teaming up with strangers can be rewarding, but is dead risky.

Also, it is of limited appeal. Once you get bored of trying to survive, or mercilessly picking on other players, there is nothing more to do. But like I said, it’s an Alpha mod and it’s free. This may be a bit of a harsh call, but like Mr. Haverhill says… If you put it out there, we will compare it to everything else that is out there. That said… It’s an Alpha and it’s free!!

Oh, and there are melee weapons available (I’ve had a crowbar and a fire axe in my time). But you cannot use them for melee attacks. Perhaps I should rephrase that. I could not use them for melee attacks. I’m told that you can. But, to be honest, I kind of lost my bottle and ran screaming. Getting hit, hurts (duh!). Incidentally, the running screaming is a tactic I have used to good affect many, many times. Even after some nice guys kitted me out with a couple of nice guns and some camo (yes, the bald guy in the above pic is me).

The Ugly

There are two points that really bug me about this game… um… mod. And another that is merely an irritation.

Firstly, and this is nothing to do with the Mod, the interface is a bloody nightmare. It is the worst FPS (first person shooter) interface that I have ever encountered. But this is down to Bohemia, as it is all part of Arma II… not Day Z. But if you play Day Z, you use the interface. Half the keys don’t seem to do what they suggest they should. Hell, you can’t even lean to look round a corner unless you are holding a gun.

Secondly, connecting to a server is a complete pain. I have had several occasions of sitting there for getting on for 15 mins while it slowly loads, only to be dropped and have to start again. Some other servers I have been straight in. There does not seem to be any reason to it. Hell, I have sat in front of my computer for nearly two hours trying to get onto a server!

I have to keep repeating to myself, it is only an Alpha, it is only an Alpha!

Finally, the irritating one, installing it is a bit of a bitch. There are many variations of Arma II and Op Arrowhead available. This is a good thing. It gives you flexibility. But took me a while to work out what I needed to buy to play Day Z (yes, I bought it just for the mod). And once you have done this, you need to make sure that the right updates, patches and mods are installed. And with the various options available, this is tricky. That said there are some great guides on the web. And once it is done, it’s pretty easy to keep on top of.

All in all, this is an exceptionally good mod. There are huge irritations involved, but it is not a commercial release. If it were, I would be shitting on it from a great height. But for what it is, what you get is far and away above what I would expect, or have encountered in the past.

[NOTE: If I were comparing this to commercial releases, I would only give it a 5.5/6. But it's not. So it gets a...]

Rating: 7.5 out of 10 stars

It’s true! It’s all true! Everything you have read, everything you have heard. Every shadow you thought something was lurking in, every bump in the night, every feeling of being watched. It wasn’t your imagination.

People tell you that these things don’t exist. But they do. And here you will meet them face to gristly face.

There are two sides to the world we live in. The world we all know. The safe and comforting world where undead creatures don’t leap from the shadows and try to eat your face, where the outer gods don’t show up and seriously ruin your day. And there is The Secret World. A world where governments cover up all of the things that would make us hide behind our sofa’s. Where shady organisations battle against the unknown (and each other) for power. And it is in this Secret World the game takes place. You are a pawn of one of these secret organisations. You dance to their tune. But it’s up to you to find out what that tune is.

Aside from the machinations of these globally dominating powers, you will have to deal with undead creatures from the depths of the oceans, luckless citizens that have been infected with the ‘filth’, demons and creatures that defy description. And none of them seem to like you much.

Fortunately, you don’t have to face them unarmed. Because you have been stung by a bee. I kid you not. Obviously this was not your run of the mill bee, but we are straying into the realm of spoilers. Suffice it to say, if you have been stung by the right kind of bee you can kick some serious arse.

The Secret World is a refreshing step in the evolution of MMO’s. But is it worth your time, effort and the reasonably hefty subscription fee? Especially as there are so many others out there to choose from. I’m not sure yet. I’m not an easy sell. But so far I’m kinda loving this one.

Ok, what makes it different… First up, it is set in the modern world. All the others I have played are fantasy or Sci-Fi (or died before they really existed). Secondly, it is horror based. Yes, many others have claimed to be so . But this one really is. And finally, it is kinda different (and I have played a lot of it).

You get to join one of the three major factions in the game. The Templars (Order and goodness), the Dragons (Chaos and naughtiness) or the Illuminati (Capitalism and conspiracy theory). But other than the back story and a bit of flavour (and minor in game stuff), it has absolutely NO impact upon the game. You occasionally do Faction missions, and the flavour of these really fill out the story of your chosen faction. But other than that, there is no real impact upon the game. Except for PvP (player vs player). You fight for your faction in the battle for world domination.

After character creation, you do the usual newbie intro shit. The tutorial level is a nice introduction to the world. It shows you enough to play the game, but not enough to understand it. And this is a beautiful taster of what to expect. The Secret World is one of mystery. Every step you take offers you glimpses into a world much more complex, that exists around you, but you have never truly experienced before.

Once you get into the real world (there are several levels of intro, faction hub and transportation hub, none of which are irritating), you are thrown into genre heavy nods. The initial stages of the game are heavily influence by the Cthulu Mythos and Stephen King. In fact the works of Lovecraft hold sway in this world, and this is one of the major reasons I am revelling in it. But there are many other, less in your face, nods to that which has shaped the worlds we love to immerse ourselves in. I am not going to throw out spoilers, but the Twin Peaks thing at the Motel and the James Herbert references (which I may have imagined, but I’m gonna run with) really made me smile a lot. And they were not the whole.

So, you get to beat down zombies and a bunch of minor denizens that resemble those from the Cthulu mythos. This is good. Is this enough? Ok, the Filth (think Alan Wake and you’re not far wrong) and suggestions that there is more going on, and you get a small insight into the world they are throwing at our feet.

But is it fun?

Well, at the moment… Hell yeah! I was so bored of hitting Orcs with a pointy stick. Now I get to shoot undead in the face with a shotgun. But if shotguns aren’t your bag, you also get assault rifles, pistols, swords, fists, sledgehammers, and three different kinds of magic. And if what you are using doesn’t float yer boat, you can try something else. You are not locked into anything, and you don’t lose any of what you have already learned. In fact, if you play for long enough you can learn everything. Which is nice, but will take you quite a while. And by ‘quite a’, I mean ‘a REALLY big’.

As for the missions… I could wax lyrical about these for hours. But I won’t. A hell of a lot of thought has been put into these. Most other MMO’s I have played have pretty standardised missions. Not here. Yes, there is a certain amount of similarity… because there has to be to a certain extent. But one type of mission that I have never encountered before are ‘Investigation’ missions.

These provide you with clues. You then have to solve the clues. This isn’t as easy as it sounds. Many of the clues refer to things outside the game. Things, assuming that you aren’t an all knowing planet brain, you will have to search the interweb for. Fortunately they provide an in game browser for just this purpose. One that goes to the real interweb, not a home grown in game imitation. A mate and I put our sizable brains together, and it still took us well over an hour to solve the first one. If this doesn’t sound like fun you can always skip them, or utilise one of the guides that people have already flooded the web with. But my advice… don’t. They are seriously good fun. Having to actually think in one of these games is really refreshing.

If you are new to MMO’s you may find it a bit overwhelming. It seems to have been designed challenge MMO fans. If you are coming to it fresh you may struggle. But don’t let that put you off. It is not insurmountable. And much fun can be had simply running around doing the missions that are thrown in your face (and it does neatly lead you from place to place without feeling like your are being lead by the nose). But to advance beyond (much past) the first region, you will have to dabble with advancement (learning more abilities). But fret not. There is a bit of in game guidance (decks). And there are plenty of guides on the web, and people in the game are (for the most part) really helpful.

If you are an old hand at MMO’s you may find it a bit of a challenge, but I refer you to everything I said in the previous paragraph. Think you are superior to newbies? TSW is a bit of a leveller.

But all in all, it is seriously good fun. It is a rich environment with buckets of nods to the genre we love (I grinned lots at the sign on the offices of a professional ‘Horrorist – part time’), and is hugely varied in content. I would challenge any game head to not find something they enjoy in it. And is a cornucopia for horror fans.

The Geek Bit

If you are not an MMO player, you may not understand all of the references in this bit. I would explain them, but I really can’t be arsed.

First up, there are no character levels or classes. XP earns Ability Points and Skill Points. You spend them where you want to create your own build. AP are used to buy abilities (the things you use to hit, heal, buff or debuff shit). SP are used to raise your ability to use stuff (weapons or kit). And there are absolutely no restrictions. And sadly, very little in game guidance about this. Thank heavens for the interweb.

The beauty of this is you can craft the build you want. The down side is that there is a vast array of what you can choose. And I mean VAST!!!

You can carry 2 weapons, and all of the abilities are linked to one of the nine weapon classes available. On top of that, you can only equip 7 active (hitty or healy) abilities and 7 passive (just kinda sit there and do stuff on their own) abilities. So you have to pick the few abilities from the dozens (as in multiples of a dozen) of abilities you can choose for each weapon class that compliment each other. This is no mean feat, and will keep the number crunchers happy for many an hour. For the rest of us, we can just go for the ones that make pretty sparkles and big bangs.

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

The Good? Funcom have tried to do something different. The no levels thing is refreshing. And no classes means you can create the build you want. You are not tied into a predefined form. And if you don’t like what you are, you can change it (with a bit of work). The world is great. If you want to blat through and kill loads of things, you can. But if, like me, you want to immerse yourself in the mythos… you can do it in spades. Each NPC will waffle on for ages (if you click on the dialog options they provide). These are not compulsory, and don’t really provide much mission related info. But they do help set the pace and the idiom of the game. It’s not all about running around and hitting things. It is also about immersing yourself in the world. They have spent a lot of time crafting character and depth to the universe. This is where you will find it (in the none essential dialogue, I mean). And wandering around exploring has more reward than just seeing pretty landscape. Oh, and the crafting system is absolutely fantastic (and used in missions). There is more, but I shall move on…

The Bad? Funcom have tried to do something different. As I said, I applaud this. But it is kinda complicated. The tutorial missions teach you how to play the game. But there is so much more than playing the game. Old hands of MMO’s (like myself) will suffer a real culture shock when it comes to the advancement system. It does work, but it takes getting to grips with. And trying to work out if you can cope with ‘instances’ (group ‘dungeons’)… Levels made it easy. TSW‘s none level approach, not so much. New MMO players may well feel completely swamped. It is not an insummountable hill to climb, but I would not envy a complete newby to this game (unless you have people like me to tap for assistance (I am willing to help, but if you bug me too much…)). Oh, and the subscription. You get the obligatory one month play free (for your £30 quid game purchase). But after that it’s £12 a month. That is pretty fuckin’ steep in my book. All the others are about £9. Is this to keep the kids out? This I like. But I’m poor.

The Ugly? Um… Well, not so much. If you are an old hand at MMO’s there are differences that you will have to get used to (some abilities are based on your target, some on which way you are facing). If you are fresh on the scene, it is likely to be a bit confusing. But it does not seem to be intended for people who want things neatly layed out on a plate for them. And there are plenty of guides on the interweb to help you through stuff.

But what is the gameplay like?

Well it’s an MMO. So we are talking third person, click on a bad guy and hit buttons to hurt him (other than when the buttons just shoot in the direction you are facing). But the variety of ‘standard’ quests are above and beyond anything I have previously encountered. You have your ‘go here and kill so many of these’, but there is so much more. You also have your sabotage missions. You need to go somewhere and do something, but killing everything that moves on the way may well screw you sideways. It’s not a Metal Gear or Splinter Cell stealth mission. But it is a nice change from ‘if it moves, kill it’. And there are investigation missions. Killing things is not the point. You need to follow the clues and solve the problems. And many of them are not obvious. I’m not talking the wander about clicking on everything until you find what works, cos the world is big. That method would get old very quickly. These need thought. Occasionally (very) cryptic, but not unbeatable. But after playing one, you will spend a lot more time looking at what you run past, and this adds huge depth to your enjoyment of the environment. But the depth and scale of the missions varies greatly. There are long sweeping story based ones, medium lengthed NPC based ones, short ‘picked up in the field’ ones. Hell, if I covered everything I’d be here for a week (and you’d get bored). At the risk of over enthusing… these are the BEST thing in the game. As hinted at, I have played many MMO’s. These are the most inventive, refreshing and fun missions I have played in many years.

This being the modern world, you’d expect the facilities that we have. And so you are given. There is an in game web browser. Not some dodgy in game intraweb. The proper thing. The first clue based mission I came across mumbled something about seasons and a year(no spoilers here). I googled it on the in game browser, worked out what they were getting at and solved it. Shit is not handed to you on a plate in this game. You don’t get big arrows pointing to every solution (some, yes. All, no). And for this, I’m kinda falling for the game. Actually, that is not true. I have already fallen for it. You don’t know morse code? And we have yet another reason God invented Google.

Some of the investigation missions are being raved about as the best MMO experiences that some people have had. And I’m inclined to agree.

All in all, this is a long awaited kick up the arse for MMO’s. SWtOR was hugely anticipated, but kinda failed. The game didn’t support the hype. This one had no hype (that I caught, I found out about it less than a week before release). But right now, I’m kinda hooked.

Rating: 7.5 out of 10 stars

Platforms: Windows, Mac OSX, Linux

Okay, I have a confession to make. Despite being a huge fan of horror films, horror games have always scared the living crap out of me. I’m not sure I’ve ever been able to play one right through to the end. There’s just something about them that affects me on a totally different level to their filmic counterparts.

…so what better review to write than that of Frictional Games’ Amnesia: the Dark Descent; which is considered by many to be one of the scariest games of all time?

Yikes.

Amnesia is a first-person survival horror that follows the story of a young man who awakens in the heart of a sprawling gothic castle, the only three things he is able to remember about himself are his name, his birthplace, and that something is hunting him. Not long afterwards, he finds a note written by his own hand explaining that he had deliberately purged his own memory clean in an attempt to forget what has befallen him, and that to truly escape the horrors that plague him he must journey to the Inner Sanctum of the castle and kill the baron of the castle, Alexander of Brennenberg.

Amnesia is very Lovecraftian in its setup; having no knowledge of the events which have transpired, Daniel must explore Castle Brennenberg, finding his own diary entries along the way in an attempt to establish the events leading up to his incarceration in the castle (of course, why he would go to the effort of leaving himself expository notes after deliberately destroying his own memory is beyond me. Maybe I haven’t played the game enough yet?). Aside from the diary entries, the narrative is also delivered through a number of brief flashbacks, in which the voices of Daniel, Alexander and a number of other characters can be heard. Whilst being an effective way of revealing the plot to the player, the choice to deliver the narrative through voiceovers alone emphasises the sheer loneliness that permeates the game.

…which brings me neatly on to what Amnesia does best. Atmosphere. Amnesia succeeds where many horror games fail (I’m looking at you, Dead Space.): it has a great sense of pacing. Whereas Dead Space pretty much drops you right into the centre of it all and lets you bomb around a spaceship from the get-go kicking many an alien arse, Amnesia opts to do the complete opposite. In fact, it was about a quarter of the way through the game before I saw my first monster. And even then it was from afar. Frictional Games have realised that horror games are most effective when they let your imagination run riot; in the same way that many horror movies often lead to disappointment after the antagonist is revealed (I’m looking at you, Jeepers Creepers.), others prove more effective by revelling in mystery. And boy does it work. The scares in Amnesia may consist largely of rather puerile things such as banging doors and spooky noises, but because it’s orchestrated so damned well – because everything, from the sound design, to the graphics, to the direction, work so cohesively – the whole thing becomes far greater than the sum of its parts. And to top it off, Daniel is completely helpless. There’s not a weapon to be seen. Which means, if something spots you, you’d better get out of there. Fast. Or else things won’t end well for poor, poor, crazy Daniel.

Whilst making Daniel helpless has the effect of making the player more cautious of their surroundings, it also has the secondary effect of making sure the monsters stay as much in our imagination as possible: if you’re walking down a corridor and suddenly a figure shambles out of a doorway up ahead, you don’t approach it guns blazing, because you can’t. You turn and run. You try and put as much distance between yourself and the figure as the game allows (and, if you’re anything like me, you try and put as much distance between yourself and the screen as your arms allow). Which means that all you’re left with as you’re throwing everything you can in its path is a memory of a silhouette, and that’s it. It’s then up to your imagination to fill in the blanks…in more ways than one, actually: as far as I can gather, the creatures seemingly appear and disappear almost at will, and you’re never quite sure whether you still have company or whether it’s the soundtrack playing tricks on you. I once spent about ten minutes skirting around the outside of a room, crouched as low as I possibly could, just because I thought I had heard a monster make an appearance. And of course, it hadn’t. Because fuck you, Amnesia. Even when you know you’ve been spotted and have leapt in the nearest dark corner to try and evade what would inevitably be a very messy end, you’re never truly sure of the moment the monster loses interest.

Speaking of running away, Frictional Games have implemented the same physics mechanic employed in their previous Penumbra games, allowing you to click on various objects to grab them – such as boxes, drawers, even the occasional limb – and then move the mouse to manipulate the object accordingly. Which means, if you do find a monster taking more of an interest in you than you might like, doors can be slammed shut and barricaded to ensure that the monster gets the hint.

Taking another page from the voluminous back-catalogue of Lovecraft, Amnesia employs what is effectively a sanity meter; draining whenever Daniel spends too long in the darkness, encounters an unsettling event or witnesses a monster, but recovers when progress within the game is made. Reduced sanity manifests through visual and auditory hallucinations, not to mention making Daniel more noticeable to the various things that are out to kill him. Littered moderately sparsely throughout the castle are tinderboxes that allow the player to ignite various candles and braziers; providing Daniel with the necessary light to keep him sane. However, one of the interesting things about this game is that contrary to games such as Remedy Entertainment’s Alan Wake, light doesn’t save you from the monsters. In fact, quite the opposite: it makes you more visible to them. Consequently, the player must strive to find the balance between lighting enough torches to keep Daniel sane, but not so many that he becomes visible to every creature within a hundred yard radius (did someone say hyperbole?). And of course, the more torches are lit, the more likely the player is to run out of tinderboxes and find themselves engulfed in darkness at a later point. It’s quite a clever little trick that makes the game just that bit more tense.

Adding greatly to the tension is the soundtrack. Occasionally music will be used to denote specific occurrences (such as being spotted by a monster), but largely it consists more of ambient noises; low strings, haunting metallic screeches, insectoid buzzing and the like. Fortunately the appearances of the various monsters within the game are signposted with a disturbing groan, so even if you haven’t spotted it yet you know you just have to run. Whilst all the voice work is great, special mention must be given to the voice of Alexander of Brennenberg; Sam A. Mowry. Giving a very impressive stab at an English accent (I was genuinely surprised when I found out he was American), Sam A. Mowry’s deep gravelly tones give the baron a wonderfully sinister, menacing quality that is perfect for his character.

Despite the graphics not being of the greatest quality, the castle itself is beautifully, hauntingly realised, from the sweeping archways of the stone hallways to the dark, dilapidated basements, to the strangely cosy living quarters; and the way the visuals wax and wane whilst the movements get deliberately more sluggish as Daniel’s sanity plummets is a nice – if not necessarily convenient – touch.

There are no two ways about it: Amnesia is a great game. It’s brave enough to do what many games (and films) aren’t; it doesn’t jump up and down waving its arms about, screaming ‘YOU SHOULD BE SCARED AT THIS POINT’. Oh no. It stands behind you, just out of sight, and simply waits. And waits.

And waits.

Rating: 9 out of 10 stars

Lollipop Chainsaw is a hugely enjoyable game. It’s frenetic, massive amounts of fun and, although a little short, a must for any horror gamers.

From the twisted minds of Goichi Suda (SUDA 51) and James Gunn (Troma alum who directed Slither and Super), Lollipop Chainsaw is my favourite game of 2012 so far (but that’s perhaps only because Borderlands 2 hasn’t been released yet.) It follows high school cheerleader Juliet Starling on her birthday as she is forced to return to San Romero High to fight hordes of newly infected zombies. Oh yeah, did I mention she’s also a zombie hunter with a Japanese mentor and a severed head for a boyfriend that she carries around on her belt?

Lollipop Chainsaw will undoubtedly garner comparisons to Suda’s No More Heroes in terms of gameplay and style, if nothing else. It takes place in a rainbow coloured candy commercial of a World and the characters and backgrounds are all very much larger than life. This works to the games advantage though as it doesn’t look much like anything else I’ve seen lately and stands out amidst a sea of drab war-centric games and generic hack and slash-ers.

Juliet is restricted to just one weapon, her chainsaw, (and later on, a chainsaw canon) but there are such an array of combinations and attacks that it never gets boring. She is also able to use her pom-poms (that’s not a euphemism) to stun the zombies and make them easier to kill. Killing zombies, amongst other things such as destroying vending machines, earns Juliet zombie medals which can be used in the shop within the game. In the shop she can buy new attacks, health bonuses, different outfits, music and artwork. After one play through, I still hadn’t made much of a dent on these items which adds to the games vast re-playability.

The characters are fairly well written too, and their dialogue is crudely hilarious, no surprise given that James Gunn was the man in charge of the pen. Along the way we meet Juliet’s family, who are also zombie hunters, naturally, as well as a number of brilliantly realised bosses. The boss battles are where you’re likely to have the most fun. With backing music composed by Mindless Self Indulgence’s Jimmy Urine, they’re frenetic, bonkers and the difficulty increases very smoothly, giving you enough time to learn and practise before being thrown in at the deep end. That’s not to say they’re easy though, the final battle involving a giant Elvis-a-like zombie named Killabilly took a reasonable amount of time to get through and was, at times, pretty tough.

The rest of the soundtrack is a mixed bag with some obvious choices, like Lollipop by The Chordettes and some more obscure tracks by Skrillex, Children Of Bodom and Atari Teenage Riot. One thing I will say though, is if you have a particular aversion to Toni Basil’s Oh, Mickey then you may want to limit the number of times you use one of Juliet’s special attacks otherwise that will certainly grate.

One of the highlights for me, as a horror fan first and a gamer second, was gleefully picking out the voice actors. Starring the considerable vocal talents of the prolific Tara Strong as Juliet and Michael Rosenbaum as her boyfriend Nick, there are also memorable turns from Linda Cardellini, Michael Rooker, Shawnee Smith and James’s brother Sean Gunn. Another plus point that had me grinning from ear to ear was picking up on the plethora of movie references, from the more obvious things like naming the levels after zombie movie directors (San Romero High, Fulci Fun Center, O’Bannon Farm, etc.) to some of the inspired dialogue homaging some of the greats, it was a lot of fun.

Despite the huge amount of positives there were also a couple of negatives, most notably the overly sensitive controls. In an attempt to get the player used to the rapid movements and quick-fire directional controls there is a brief prologue which serves to help you understand which buttons do what and just how fast the whole thing can move. This is fine provided that Lollipop Chainsaw is the only game you plan to play until completion. If you do what I did and mix it up with stints on something like the Gears Of War trilogy, where if anything, the controls can be a little sluggish then it can quickly become disorienting and you’ll have to spend a few minutes each time, readjusting.

If your reaction times are particularly slow, you might also become frustrated with just how fast the game does move. Especially during segments such as the occasions when Juliet places Nicks head on a decapitated zombie corpse and requires you to rapidly hit buttons to keep him moving. It wouldn’t be an issue were these sections optional but without completing them you’re unable to move forward. Other than these minor complaints though, Lollipop Chainsaw had very few drawbacks for me, although whoever made the decision to use Comic Sans for so much of the wording should be taken out back and chopped to bits, zombie or not. The storyline is, more or less, perfunctory too. It’s there to explain away the zombie outbreak and the reason for the game existing but some parts are under-written and may leave you wanting. That’s not to say that’s massively to the games detriment however, the game is so absurd and colourful, and moves at such a breakneck speed, that you might barely even notice a storyline at all.

Lollipop Chainsaw knows its limitations and works with them. The makers obviously knew that creating a game where the protagonist does nothing but hack and slash her way through hordes of the undead wearing nothing but a skimpy cheerleader outfit would soon become boring so they added enough mini games to allow you a breather from the main action and the chance to do something different. Some of the more memorable ones involve running zombies over in a combine harvester and shooting rocks before they come crashing down on a school bus that Juliet’s sister happens to have hijacked and a brilliant Pacman-inspired maze game.

The dialogue is simple but well-timed and very, very funny, our protagonist is a wonderful combination of twee teenager and ass-kicking heroine, the visuals are well realised and inventive and it’s very easy to get sucked into. It’s demented, ridiculous, over-the-top and hysterical. Ultimately there’s not a whole lot more that I can say about Lollipop Chainsaw. Calling it throwaway is unfair and does it a disservice but it’s certainly fluff and won’t require you to exercise your cerebral cortex too energetically. It does serve as an incredibly entertaining diversion though and I’m looking forward to playing it all the way through again.

Zombies? Check. Carnage? Check. Hot cheerleader? Check. Why are you still reading this and not playing Lollipop Chainsaw yet? Given the ending and the predominantly positive reception it’s received, it’s not beyond the realms of possibility that there may be a sequel in the works before too long. Here’s to hoping!

Rating: 7.5 out of 10 stars

Welcome to Banoi, an island full of sun, sea, sand and sex. And slaughter.

Dead Island is a good game; it is massively flawed but also immensely fun, surprisingly difficult and utterly addictive. Impossible to put down, this is enjoyable zombie mayhem. I look forward to the sequel, when they’ve destroyed the plethora of annoying bugs and frustrations, but until then Dead Island 1 is certainly worth buying – it is a superb zombie game.

This review is less a review and more a giant speech about the pros and cons of this highly-anticipated game, so I’ve chopped it into sections for easier reading. Aren’t I kind?

The Style

Who watched the teaser trailer for Dead Island? It features the incredible slo-mo zombie attack on a family in a hotel room, which is both disturbing and deeply moving. This gave everyone high hopes that Dead Island would be a very special piece of work indeed – maybe Fallout meets Dead Rising. Did this deliver? Hell no.

Dead Island desperately tries to be cool, which utterly contradicts that amazing, emotional teaser trailer released in February. It is funky, hip-hop culture riffing, “sexy” and ridiculous. Perhaps I’m being harsh on Dead Island, but it sold itself on being sharp and deep and clever and fails miserably to deliver on that promise. It’s big, brash, fun and bloody but as emotionally deep as a Paul W.S. Anderson film.

Your character – one of four emotionally generic, physically different people – is a quipping, monotone bugger who randomly says things like “That bitch was huge”. They each have elongated back-stories, available to read / hear when you initially pick them, but these have literally ZERO impact on the game as a whole. You learn nothing new about the character and they don’t change at all, despite helping hundreds of people and fighting through the zombie apocalypse.

Is it scary? No. Not at all. It’s more like an action film than a horror, being more about violence than the building of fear. Occasionally you’ll crap yourself when you run into five zombies in an alleyway and all you have is a bent wooden paddle to defend yourself with… but I’ve been equally as shit-scared in Call of Duty! This is not in the terrifying realms of Resident Evil / Silent Hill.

Once you recognise this, however, you’ll begin enjoying yourself. A LOT.

The Obvious Comparisons

Undoubtedly everyone will compare this to Left 4 Dead, Dead Rising and Resident Evil. Although channelling elements from all of these classics, Dead Island vigorously shakes the Dead Rising tree and lets everything fall into place: customizable weapons, escort missions, crazed human foes, find-the-whatever – it’s all in there. The only things that are different are the “open” environment and the zombies, which aren’t just docile stumblers but sprint, shamble, charge, leap and punch really fucking hard.

Despite the liberal theft from other similar titles, Dead Island is it’s own game. Just.

The Positives

The first time I threw an electrified machete at a Thug Zombie and he died instantly, I actually let out a little yelp of joy. Dead Island is a lot of fun.

I’m getting way ahead of myself. Dead Island is hugely playable, dangerously addictive, violent, bloody and simply a lot of fun. It is a must for fans of zombies – well, killing them – as it has an endless sea of zombies to destroy.

Dead Island is genuinely difficult in places. If you find yourself facing 5 zombies running down at a street at you, you know you’re screwed. Run! I realized quickly that running away from trouble is sometimes the best method, although notoriously you’ll run away from a pack of zombies round a corner and run straight into a massive zombie, who subsequently punches you in the face.

The great – and unique – thing about Dead Island is the stamina bar. You only have a certain amount of stamina, indicated by a little bar which appears when you’re straining yourself. These strains include sprinting away from the undead (hands flapping wildly) and bashing the crap out of the ghoulish scumbags. At first it’s a huge frustration when you’re battering a zombie in the face and suddenly find yourself too tired to attack any more, but luckily you’ve always got a handy “kick” button that can knock flesh-eaters onto their rotten arses, which takes no stamina to do.

After a while you begin to understand the stamina bar and have careful choices to make when venturing into zombieland – some weapons pack a powerful punch but take a LOT of stamina to exert (two-handed axes, for example) whilst others are less powerful but you can use repeatedly before running out of steam (cleavers, knives etc…). It’s cunningly done, and although infuriating at times, it certainly makes the game’s difficulty level rocket. It’s a great addition.

One thing about Dead Island is how beautiful it is. The Chrome engine used makes for absolutely sublime visuals, from the amazing beaches to the grim n’ gritty streets of Moresby – it’s a visually stunning game.

Dead Island has a levelling system familiar to anyone who’s ever played a computer game, and it lets you increase skills in three areas – COMBAT, SURVIVAL and a third character-specific skill. Combat helps improve your specialist ability (sharp weapons, blunt weapons etc..) and survival ensures you have more stamina, can pick locks etc… The levelling system is rudimentary stuff and it often feels it has little impact (other than the lockpick skill, which is directly useful). It’s a nice touch, but needs to be more exciting than just 2% improvement on the effectiveness of blunt weapons or whatever. Talking of weapons…

Weapons!

The electrified machete I mentioned earlier is one of hundreds of different weapons available to you; sticks, pistols, knives, paddles, Molotov cocktails, baseball bats, hammers, bombs… the lists goes on and on. Initially you’ll find a smattering of objects lying about the beach and in huts – diving knives, battered oars, hat-stands (!) – but the more people you meet, the more “mods” and special weapons you discover, and you can begin creating your own weapons. Hence the electrified machete.

You can use these weapons in two ways; attack with them head on or throw them from afar. I really enjoy seeing a zombie sprinting at me, choosing my flaming baseball bat, then lobbing it at the bastard and watching him get knocked down and catch fire! Genius!

Guns are scarce until you drive into the town of Morseby, but even these are piddly pistols with limited ammo – good for shooting other humans, but crap at taking down a big zombie. And up close? You may as well put the barrel in your mouth and pull the damn trigger. Guns are decent but unreliable.

All the weapons also degrade with use, so if you keep bashing away at zombies with your heavy-modded lumphammer, it will eventually break. Unlike Dead Rising, however, you can pay to repair the items before they die forever. It’s an inventive idea and it means you’re careful with your weapon choice. Some people will hate the return-to-the-workbench, but I relished it.

Annoyingly you only have a limited space in your inventory for weapons, and this forces you to make some tough and bloody frustrating choices: keep the magnum pistol or throw it away in favour of a massive axe? It’s necessary that you can’t have a hundred weapons, but it’s annoying having to get rid of a great weapon because you want a bottle of whisky…

Zombies!

The undead come in various guises, visually and otherwise. At the resort the undead are bikini-clad, Hawaiian shirted, bronzed monsters, whilst in town they’re people dressed in “normal” clothes. Although there is a lot of repetition in the “zombie look” – at one point I had three identical men in bright yellow shirts and red shorts sprinting down a hill at me! – they also have varying levels of decay. The detail is sharp and smart, where some will be showing their ribs through a ripped up chest and others will be fresh and blood free. It’s a nice touch, and you can easily add to their injuries by hacking off limbs or beating holes into their stomachs… which is also visually awesome.

The zombies also have levels (yep!) and you’ll find that out the hard way. Not only that, but there are varying types of undead bastard to kill. At first it’s just stumbling gimps, then some faster ones and then – my personal most-hated-zombie – the Thug. Thugs are slow moving but steroid-fuelled body-builder types who can knock you down in one punch. Best tackled from afar, that’s where the “lob the electrified machete” comes in… Each zombie has a certain amount of “life” and the points are slowly hacked and slashed off them. It’s fun watching a zombie on fire slowly lose hit points as it sprints pathetically towards you. Burn, undead bitch, burn!

There are also “special” zombies. So far I’ve encountered three types – one is the exploding one (Boomer, anyone?) that seriously seriously harms anyone nearby. Do NOT run up to it and twat it with a hammer – trust me, that is instant death. Then there’s the massive blokes in strait jackets – kind of like a steroid-induced Hannibal Lecter meets Tom Hardy’s Bane – that are virtually impossible to kill unless you throw everything at them or run the bastards over with a truck. He knocks you down by brushing you, he’s that hard. And finally I’ve noticed some zombies with a green smoke billowing from them. I have no idea what they are or what they do, but the smoke is kind of irritating and probably poisonous.

The Missions

Plot wise Dead Island is pretty obvious. Zombie outbreak, get off the island. The end. The main storyline propels you around the maps, facing harder and harder tasks, from obtaining car parts from crashed vehicles to turning off all the fire hydrants in town (which is bloody difficult).

There are many many sub-plots / missions in Dead Island, spit into two categories – continuous missions and one-offs. The continuous missions involve obtaining something specific (like water) for someone, and you gain a little experience and some money every time you do it. Useful for topping up experience, kind of pointless otherwise. The other side missions are escorts, find-the-something etc… which are varied and interesting. Success in these result in gaining a lot of money, some special weapons or even weapons modifications plans, which is awesome.

Admittedly the side-missions can be absolutely bloody stupid. One man wants you to find him alcohol, for a handy bit of hair-of-the-dog during a zombie apocalypse. Another woman wants her teddy bear. Another wants “brand” champagne. Conversely there are also some very smart, saddening missions, such as getting insulin, asthma inhalers and one – which is particularly horrible – that involves killing someone’s undead family so he knows they’re resting in peace. A mixed bag, mission wise.

Overall the mission structure is unoriginal but compelling and exciting enough. Each mission is labelled with a difficulty rating (Very Easy, Easy, Medium, Hard and Very Hard) so you know whether you’re ready to tackle them or not. It’s a nice little addition that works well and does instil a sense of fear when you finally attempt the Very Hard mission…

Multiplayer

Sadly I haven’t played multiplayer Dead Island, although at one point a random person did appear in my game, stole everything from all the suitcases and killed the zombies around me… The ability to drop-in to anyone’s game can be turned off, but it’s automatically set to “let strangers appear” when you begin. It also constantly informs you about buttmonkey56 or johnnyape1985 playing nearby, if you want to join them (which is both annoying and just a little bit creepy).

Multiplayer lets you and three friends battle through the entire story together, which should be immense fun. My lack of friends who own the game, however, has meant I haven’t had a chance to test it. Only time will tell…

The Negatives

Okay, here goes…

There appears to be a large number of glitches, which suggest Dead Island wasn’t tested rigorously enough or that the makers found them acceptable enough for the rushed release date. One particular problem is with that hair-of-the-dog moron who requires you deliver him alcohol for cash reward. I ran all over the island finding alcohol, and when I first returned to him and gave it to him he took it ALL and paid me nothing. The side-quest remained open. I tried again with the same shit results. When I turned Dead Island off, however, and played it again, our alcoholic paid out twice… then on the third time failed to even acknowledge I’d given him all of my freakin’ alcohol! This happened early on, and did not bode well for the rest of the game…

There are a number of other noticeable glitches throughout – when I first appeared on the new map of Moresby and saved it in a Church, I quit and when I reloaded the game I appeared in an undiscovered warehouse on the other side of town! There were also a few occasions that zombies would attack & knock me somewhere where I’d promptly become stuck in (behind a shelving unit, in some rocks etc…), which is infuriating. Reload ahoy.

The biggest and frequently frustrating part of Dead Island is the godawful save system. You cannot save the game whenever you like, there is nowhere specific you can save the game (no typewriters, for example!) and no way of knowing when it was actually last saved. You have one save game and it saves it frequently but randomly. There are checkpoints when you complete missions (and at other seemingly random times), but these are never greatly clear. When you DIE you appear at the last “Checkpoint” not at the last “Saved” place – the saved points just save your progress, not your position on the Map. It’s a bizarre, awkward, frequently confusing system that should’ve been sorted out a LONG time before being released. The worst part of dying in Dead Island is not losing a bit of money when you cop it, but how irritating it is when you respawn miles away from where you were! Or right slam-back in the same place, where eight zombies are!

Talking of Maps – when you move to a different “map” you’re unable to visit the previous / other maps unless you physically return there, which is okay unless you’re inside a building that has NO map (like the abandoned houses in Moresby, the sewers, City Hall, the supermarket!). Once inside, you have no idea where you are or where the exit door will lead to… because there’s no map of the outside world. It’s a simple but stupid mistake – sadly a frequent thing in Dead Island.

Oh, and Maps AGAIN – and this is REALLY annoying – the “open” environment we wander around in does have borders (obviously), but unlike Fallout or Grand Theft Auto, the edges of the environment aren’t just denoted by mountains you can’t climb or sea you can’t swim through, but by the most lazy method available – a sign flashes on the screen saying “You are leaving the playable area”. This patronizing icon appears in some of the most absurd places; on some rocks, on part of a beach, even a patch of water BETWEEN two playable areas! These non-playable areas are not flagged on the maps, so when you’re looking for a crashed plane (for example) it’s massively frustrating not knowing what is accessible and what is – in fact – not a playable area! This little sign also destroys any illusion of reality. It’s lazy, infuriating stuff.

After the random spawning of the undead in Left 4 Dead, you’d hope Dead Island would’ve learned from this, but alas they have not. Zombies reappear in precisely the same places, so after a while you begin to KNOW exactly how many zombies will be in each location. Three by that ambulance, one in the pool, three behind the coach etc… It is a minor issue, but it’s disappointing that there’s no variety.

Zombies aren’t the only things that respawn – EVERYTHING does! One of the main maddening tediums of Dead Island is searching every suitcase, cupboard, corpse, shelf, box, wallet, fridge and basket for money and useful items (such as detergent, wire, batteries etc…) – but these also respawn. The contents are random too, so you can steal money from a bag, exit the game, come back and steal a belt. It’s endless and horribly repetitive. You could literally make a million dollars if you just revisited a place over and over again after quitting and restarting. It’s seriously dumb.

Gameplay! For the most part gameplay is solid and exciting, but at times you feel the damage you’re causing is absolutely random. You can use the same weapon four times and it’ll hack off a limb, knock someone over, do hardly any damage and instantly kill, and it doesn’t seem to matter how you wielded it!

And finally, the voicework – it’s substandard stuff, and apart from the dire-logue between characters, the constant quips your character makes become a little irritating, especially because they’re clearly absolutely bloody random. I had to kill someone’s zombified daughter, an emaciated 4 foot tall zombie girl, and when my character cuts her head off he throws out a “That bitch was huge” quip. Either he’s being wryly sarcastic and deliberately offensive or the game – once again – makes an awkward mistake that sits uncomfortably at a moment of genuine potential pathos. It was an ugly moment that made me hate my character and the game.

Rant over.

These flaws do not destroy your enjoyment, but they add to an overall sense of frustration that the game isn’t quite what it should’ve been. These are all issues that should’ve been ironed out in testing, but for whatever reason still remain in the game. Perhaps like Dead Rising, the sequel will eradicate these problems and make for a truly amazing experience. Roll on Dead Island 2: Canvey Island Apocalypse.

I have literally just read there is a MASSIVE patch for day one release of Dead Island – 37 fixes! – although most of them do not address the frustrations above.

A Conclusion of Sorts

Play Dead Island.

It has it’s faults – lots of them, all minor – but overall it’s absolutely stunning, endless fun, brutal, bloody, ridiculous, challenging and incredibly addictive.

Bold, brash and gory, this will be loathed by some and adored by others – it is the Dawn of the Dead remake of zombie gaming.

Dead Island is not perfect, but it is a great game.

*   *   *   *   *

Dead Island is Developed by: Deep Silver & Techland

Platforms: Xbox 360, Playstation 3, PC

This review is based on playing the Xbox 360 version of Dead Island

Rating: 7 out of 10 stars

Finnish based Remedy Entertainment must have known they were on to a winner when they embarked on Alan Wake. Boasting itself as more of a TV series than a mere game by its makers, we are lead to believe that this six-part episodic thriller has triggered the revival of the tired horror genre of video games. Let’s see, shall we?

Eponymous Alan Wake is a famous horror author who travels to the picturesque town of Bright Falls with his wife Alice to shift a severe case of writer’s block. But when he suddenly wakes up at the wheel of a crashed car with no idea what transpired and no sign of Alice, the idyllic town starts to turn a darker shade. This foreboding sense of anxiety will translate to gamers in a compelling way as you journey on to find Alice through a roughly ten-hour third person exploration, and restore truth to the broken pieces of Alan’s recollection.

But here comes the first speed bump to this pep rally; the narration. Five minutes in and the game feels like an episode of Jackanory. Alan tells the whole story through his own narration, as if the damn thing is trying to make-believe itself into a book, as well as a TV series, oh and a game. Immediately you’re struck with the impression that this game is trying to be too much all at once. Biting off more than it can chew, the cluttered construction feels over ambitious and flawed.

But as soon as the mention of gameplay is made, this game is untouchable. The genius premise of Alan Wake is the battle between light and darkness. Your enemies are townspeople ‘taken’ (as they are aptly named) by a strange darkness that controls them like vicious marionettes to hunt down anything still living in the light. This bond with the dark makes them seemingly indestructible in the night-time setting, unless you first deplete their immortal barrier with light.

This comes in the form of Alan Wake’s most trusty and unorthodox ally – his flashlight.

Instead of this extra requirement taxing the player’s patience, the beauty of this mechanism is that every button on the control pad is utilized to simplistic perfection. Focusing on the triggers, hold left for your flashlight and tap right to follow through with bullets. Dispatching of enemies is quick and easy in this fashion, and you find yourself coming to grips with it in no time. It would have been nice to progress from these basics quicker, or perhaps see some variation on the methods, but extra challenges do eventually come. Even as your arsenal builds to include explosive light sources such as flare guns and flash bangs, and firearms come by the pair, at no time does this become overwhelming. One quick selection on the D-pad and you can switch between all of your supplies in no time to get yourself out of a tight spot, often striking a flare to ward surrounding enemies backwards into the darkness with one quick stab of the right bumper.

What’s more, the aesthetics of this game are absolutely stunning. From the very first step into the dark, you are constantly awe-inspired by the lighting effects that so cunningly spoil the darkness of the forest trails. Feeling almost like a physical ally, you will often feel your heart lift when you sprint into a pool of lamplight on the ground, knowing it will expel enemies around you. The foreboding threat of what lurks in the shadows is maximized by the open expanse of the free-roaming landscape, and genuinely feels unsettling when the taken can materialize from any dark corner, and poltergeist furniture comes flying at you when you’re not looking.

But it is the power of the storytelling that this game has been promising us was worth the nine year wait from announcement to completion. Let’s just say that gone are the days of Japanese script writers oozing hilarity with Jill sandwiches, and for that we are eternally thankful.

Writer Sam Lake is an exception to the game writing rule when it comes to horror, and it is about time. His obvious knowledge and respect for the genre shows a love of classic horror, and a motif of famous horror penmanship is laced in with the equivocal plot to create a profound experience for those of us who love this genre too. Stephen King is quoted so religiously that it is as if he is a scholarly reference, and for those of you who can read the word Cthulhu and pronounce it correctly, you will get a kick out of the striking similarity the deliberately ambiguous threat of ‘darkness’ has to the mythical monsters of H. P. Lovecraft. What’s more, the unmistakable Lovecraftian method of investigatory storytelling is utilized in this game, from asking the player to hunt down radio transmissions and television broadcasts, to discovering secret light-sensitive scrawls on the walls and lost pages of a manuscript Alan Wake cannot even remember writing himself.

Lake earns the trust of horror fans out there, and I feel he will have brought many back to the table. But I will sell my own organs if any of you can tell me what the hell the poor bloke meant with this storyline. A step too far in the ambiguity stakes, it leaves the gaming experience feeling somewhat cheapened by the deliberate set up for sequels and downloadable content; thank you Microsoft. Oh, and they have just released a paperback book version too. Steady on.

But love or hate it, you cannot deny the charm of this game. The reason it gets such a generous score from me is that it is so easy to immerse yourself in. Part of the point of this thing is to confuse the hell out of you, because you follow it like the last season of Lost purely in the blind hope that your questions will be answered. No doubt, Alan Wake should have been a smoother harmony of the conflicting formats it is trying to morph into all at once, but hell, at least it’s trying something new. The way the game plays with you (special mention going to one truly memorable ploy in the middle of the story) is worthy of its’ psychological stamp and sales figures so far. So forgive the clumsiness of its deliverance, because this game has managed it, it will get you excited about horror gaming again. And for that, we salute you Remedy.

Rating: 9 out of 10 stars

It seems like psychological horror has taken a sick day recently, and in walks its gun-toting big brother. Resident Evil was one of the first to swap haunted house for open-warfare, and there are mixed reviews as to just what effect this evolution has not only had, but continues to have across the board. Although Silent Hill still claims to be nestled nicely in its scary little sub-genre, there sadly isn’t any denying the shotgun shells in this newest instalment; Silent Hill V: Homecoming.

Homecoming sees new protagonist Alex Shepherd return home to Shepherd’s Glen, following discharge from military service. As the town’s wayward son takes his first steps however, you start to get the feeling that home is not the way he left it. As the first instances of Akira Yamaoka’s hauntingly beautiful score creeps in along with the surrounding fog, your nerves rightly jangle. The further you go, the more you start to unravel about the secrets of the Glen, including the many disappearances of the townspeople and the state of widespread dilapidation.

True to style, Alex isn’t left to wander around unharmed either. The ungodly creatures in this series are suddenly much more brutal. Often attacking at full assault, you barely get a chance to get scared before they’re on you: male bodies spread-eagled with scythe blades sewn onto each of their four limbs, moaning mutilations of male and female body parts, feral flesh tattered dogs and of course, the nurses. Those sexy little madams are worth a mention, because although their faces are bandaged, they can swing a knife faster than you can pull your eyes up from their boobs. So watch it. I got stuck in a corridor with five of the nasty buggers and they cut me into ribbons.

As for gameplay, it handles well and feels quick and sharp. Whether it’s exploring the ghost town streets, or trapped indoors when the walls start to peel upwards to signify your descent into hell, Alex is fully manoeuvrable. He responds to a 360 axis that has great fluidity compared to previous horror titles, and the new allowance to duck and dodge out of enemy assaults progresses the combat to a new maturity. Trademarks are ticked off the fan boy checklist too, with Alex packing a radio that crackles when it detects oncoming enemies, (signature of the series) and a trusty flashlight. Well, I say trusty, more like a candle in a snuff box. Even turning the brightness way on high, you still feel like you’re about eighty-five with cataracts trying to see through the blackness on screen. It’s as if Konami is wagging its tail and begging you to appreciate it for trying. But this weak attempt at building atmosphere just left me annoyed and frankly, insulted.

Here’s another subtlety that’s been stamped on; you don’t give a shit about the leading man.

He is an ex-soldier; he comes home, goes after his missing little brother and that about sums him up, sadly. He has these supposed intricate problems, but you just don’t care about them. With Silent Hill, you want to believe in the lead, because their instability often added the most compelling layer to the game’s intrigue. Never knowing whether you could trust an unstable, frightened victim was the sharp psychological edge. Homecoming just seemed to cough up a reserve and force him to play on court.

So there are more than a few kinks in this design. The flaws are more like gaping holes, and with the amount of cut corners here, you’re more likely to throw the game out of the window than finish it.

However, I have come up with one way to enjoy this game if you’re a determined fan, apart from lying to yourself that it’s good. The real deal with Homecoming is not to take it seriously. I realise that is the equivalent of asking you to watch The Exorcist on mute, but honestly, if you do you’ll hate this game. The first thing you have to do with this title is forget your expectations. Die-hard fans of the series (yours truly included) may have come with their heart and soul set on the archetypal spooky town we love best with nerve-damaging tension, but Homecoming is just not that.

Sure, Silent Hill is known for the twisted monstrosities that lurk around every corner and gurgle at you in the dark, but for once you can pick up an iron pipe and really stick it to ‘em. That is what this game is going for. And once I let go of all my grievances with the title, I found this extremely satisfying. The graphics make the gore shine beautifully, too. For all of you who like to see a little blood spatter on your screens, the monsters truly interact with their environment. As Alex pounds them with his latest weapon, you see their mutilated bodies glisten with blood and the game engine triggers separate animations for each species as they attempt to cower away in agony.

The key word here is fun, the cheap thrills kind. But that is all you will get. Silent Hill Homecoming is an empty packet of expectation with a Rambo scarf tied around it instead. So if you can find it in your heart to forgive Konami for following the recent trend, pick up your gun and get in there. Just don’t come crying to me Silent Hill fans, you have been warned.

Rating: 5 out of 10 stars